On The Red Couch: Bakersfield Life

On The Red Couch - Nov

From event planning to store owners, these four women certainly carry their own levels of stress at work on daily basis, which only gets worse at the holidays. Bakersfield Life sat these women down On The Red Couch to see how they handle their stress at work and at home during the holiday season.

Donna Berlin
General Manager - Valley Plaza

Susan Greer
Membership Director/Events Coordinator - Stockdale Country Club

Carol Rodgers
Owner - Bobbi’s Hallmark

Kate Roemmich
Owner - PartyTime Balloons and Event Decorating

What is the most stressful part of the holidays for you?

Donna Berlin – The preparation. We begin working months in advance to secure holiday décor and installation contracts, confi rming operating hours, scheduling increased security, housekeeping and customer service personnel to maintain the additional hours as well as countless other tasks required to bring the holidays to Valley Plaza. This year we are offering valet parking and have been working on the timing and logistics to offer the greatest benefi t to our customers. Finally, we work with 140 retailers to ensure we’re all in sync and our customers have a safe and pleasant shopping experience.

Susan Greer – Not having the time to spend getting my personal holiday matters taken care of.

Kate Roemmich – Christmas and New Year’s parties tend to be fairly elaborate and require a lot of planning to create that “wow” effect for the guests. The most stressful part of the holidays for me is to balance spending quality time with family and friends and to run my event decorating business at the same time during the busiest holiday season of the year.

Carol Rodgers – The most stressful part of the holiday season for me is making sure that our holiday offering meets our customers’ expectations. We start ordering product for the holiday season in January. To achieve the overall appearance we are looking for, we order from several companies. This year, getting orders shipped in a timely manner has been a nightmare. Still, our customers expect to see our store fi lled with new and exciting gifts and home décor.

How do you take the worry out of the season?

Donna Berlin – I tend to think good preparation minimizes worry, but with 12 million people a year passing through our doors, we can’t prepare for everything. I don’t worry about things I can’t control, but I do have contingency plans in place for a lengthy list of emergency scenarios.

Susan Greer – I try to get my events to work out all the details of their party before Thanksgiving.

Kate Roemmich – I really am not a worrier any longer. I found that worry just causes lots of anxiety that we don’t need in our lives. Instead, I make a “priorities for today” list each day and try to tackle it with a positive attitude.

Carol Rodgers – I pray a lot and I also realize how very blessed I am. I have a great family, good friends and a wonderful staff to work with. Our great staff shares the load during this busy season and I’m very thankful for them.

When do you start your shopping, baking, card writing, etc.?

Donna Berlin – What baking and card writing? Seriously, I don’t remember the last time I baked during the holidays. My husband is a big help with cards. He orders them early in the year and handles the address labels. Then, we split them for note writing and mailing (his usually go out fi rst).

Susan Greer – We slow down the week before Christmas, so that is when I can get my last minute shopping done. As far as baking and card writing, that does not exist for me during the Christmas season.

Kate Roemmich – Every year, I think, “This will be the year that I’m going to start early and be ready ahead of time.” So far, that hasn’t happened yet, so I’m hoping maybe this will be my banner year to be organized and relaxed for the holidays.

Carol Rodgers – We have our annual Holiday Open House on Nov. 8- 9 so all personal holiday plans are put on hold until the store is ready for the holidays. I usually take a day before the holidays to bake, etc. I try very hard to get my Christmas cards and letters mailed by the middle of December ... sometimes I succeed.

When do you expect to be finished with all of your shopping and card writing?

Donna Berlin – I like to get my cards out by the first week in December, but I must admit, I’m not always successful. As for shopping, I’m never finished. I’m a browser at the beginning of the season, but once I decide, I’m on a mission to check everything off my list. Of course, working in the mall, there are always last minute “can’t live without” gifts (mostly for me)!

Susan Greer – December 23, I refuse to go shopping on Christmas Eve when all the men are at the stores (sorry guys).

Kate Roemmich – I’m going to aim for the first week in December.

Carol Rodgers – Being in the social expression business, I find myself helping others with their holiday needs and putting mine on the back burner, so to speak. I have been known to spend Christmas Eve afternoon shopping.

What about your job changes during the holidays?

Donna Berlin – The job doesn’t change, but it does become more hectic and stressful. There are only a fi nite number of days between Thanksgiving and Christmas, so it’s critical that we have all of our bases covered.

Susan Greer – My hours change. I will work six days a week and anywhere between 12 and 14 hours per day.

Kate Roemmich – Being self-employed allows me to not over-book at the holidays. I limit the jobs that I’ll take on during the holidays, so it allows me to do a good job for my customers and still spend time with family and friends.

Carol Rodgers – A Hallmark store is a holiday store. We are all about helping our customers celebrate the events in their lives. I try to be much more visible on the sales fl oor during this busy season, visiting with our customers and sharing information about our products.

My daughter, Kim, and I do the gift and home décor buying for the store and it’s so nice to see our customers get excited when they fi nd just what they were looking for.

What brings you the most pleasure from the holiday season?

Donna Berlin – My family has always been my greatest source of pleasure. My children live far away and I’m not able to see them as often as I would like. My schedule does not allow me to be away from the mall between Thanksgiving and Christmas, but we always spend the week between Christmas and New Year’s together at our lake house on the border between Texas and Louisiana – a perfect way to end the season and begin the new year.

Susan Greer – Everyone seems to be in a cheerful mood. The kids are all excited and having fun. We have breakfast with Santa with about 200 children; the children get all dressed up and they get so excited to see Santa and watch the magic show.

Kate Roemmich – Definitely spending time with my grandkids.They’re the light of my life. They bring me such love and joy, and they bring out the child in me, especially at Christmas time.

Carol Rodgers – My husband and I have three grown daughters, three sons-in-law and fi ve grandchildren, all with busy lives of their own. But we all get together for Thanksgiving and Christmas and just truly enjoy ourselves. We girls gather in the breakfast room with a huge puzzle and talk, laugh and search for pieces while the guys take over the den with football games. We cook, eat and play games – no talk of work or stress – just relaxing and enjoying our time together.

Will you do more holiday shopping online or in stores this year?

Donna Berlin – I’ve used both for a while now. Online works best for books, electronics, etc., but I still think there is no replacement for the world of bricks and mortar where I can see and touch my purchases.

Susan Greer – I have already made my big purchases online and will finish with store shopping. You have to do some store shopping, it puts you in the holiday mood!

Carol Rodgers – I rarely shop online and then it’s only for concert or event tickets to give as gifts. I much prefer to see the store decorations, hear the holiday music and experience shopping for that special gift for each one on my list. I certainly look forward to lots of shoppers coming into my store so I try to return the favor.

Kate Roemmich – I’ll do more shopping online this year, especially at Toys R Us!

What are you most looking forward to this holiday season?

Donna Berlin – A successful kickoff weekend. This has been such a difficult year for retail in general, and a strong weekend typically signals a successful holiday season. Once we have the property prepared for one of the busiest shopping weekends of the year, the focus switches to maintaining the environment for our customers and store personnel for the remainder of the season.

Susan Greer – I will have my first grandchild this year. We are all so excited to have little ones at Christmas again. I can’t wait to spoil her.

Carol Rodgers – I love the holiday season. I love seeing the brightly decorated stores and homes. The most beautiful music in the world fills our homes and shops and hopefully our hearts with love. We hear from friends and family from far away and renew the bonds between us. At least once a year we can pause and reflect on the wonderful gifts of family and friends that have blessed our lives.

Kate Roemmich – The sights, smells and excitement of Christmas and celebrating the true meaning of what it’s really all about.

What are you least looking forward to?

Donna Berlin – I’m always amazed at how quickly it all passes. It always seems to start too early and end too soon!

Susan Greer – The long days leading up to Christmas. I would love to do the baking and card writing, but there is never enough time.

Carol Rodgers – The after Christmas sale – the party's over! The shelves are stripped or empty. The decorations are picked over. We are all tired. The store looks like we are having a going-out-of-business sale. It takes a while to recover and get it looking good again, and then its time for inventory!

Kate Roemmich – The madness of the shopping malls and the traffic. Where do all those extra cars on the road come from anyway?

On The Red Couch - October

Personal Choice

Many women identify themselves through their family and especially their

children. Those women are mothers first and everything else takes a back

seat. But what about women who don’t have children? Bakersfield Life

gathered these four successful women On The Red Couch to discuss their

kid-free lives.

On the Red Couch this month

Yvonne Cavanagh
Ceramics Teacher, Bakersfield High School
Co-Owner, Surface Gallery

Jennifer Jordan
Co-Owner, Fresh and Green

Karen Langston
Director of Sales and Marketing
CSU Bakersfield Athletics

Tara Aiello
Owner
Inner Bodyworks Yoga

1. Do you ever (or did you ever) want to have children?

Yvonne Cavanagh – When I was younger I thought for certain I would have children by the time I turned 30. Being that my 30th birthday is in two months, I am quite certain that is not going to happen. My life has traveled in a different direction than I may have anticipated many years ago. I felt a calling to do many things in my life: to teach ceramics, to obtain my master’s degree in education and most recently to open an art gallery. I haven’t yet felt the calling to have a child, but I am listening.

Jennifer Jordan – Yes, I do see myself at some point in my life having kids. I always thought that I would be a young mom and have kids in my 20s but as the years kept going by, I am simply just not ready yet. Life and careers have gotten in the way.

Karen Langston – I have never NOT wanted kids and I always assumed I would have them. But I feel really satisfied with where I am in my life now so I don’t feel driven by the idea.

Tara Aiello – I have three younger siblings, so when I was about 13 years old I thought children seemed like a lot of work and I didn’t want any. As I got older, as did they, my view softened. I am 28 years old however and to borrow a quote from a friend, “I still feel deeply rooted in my ambivalence.” That is to say, I believe making the choice to bring a child into the world should be taken quite seriously. I have so far felt no strong desire to do so. People always say I will change my mind so I guess I will just wait and see.

2. What advantages have you found in your personal life from not having children?

Yvonne Cavanagh –I have been married to my husband for three years and I treasure that we can do whatever we want with our time. I love that I can go out of town with my girlfriends for a weekend without a second thought. I also have a very large family, including seven nieces and nephews, and since I don’t have children of my own I am able to help my sisters whenever they need me. I also feel that financially I have been able to do some things to better my life and maybe my future child’s life, like continuing my education and opening a business.

Jennifer Jordan –I personally think the freedom of just experiencing life. I know most people with kids think that it’s better to have them when they are younger and then be retired at an early age with the kids gone. I think the opposite. This is the time I want to be free-spirited, travel and work hard expanding my business. Then, later on in my life, I will have the freedom to travel with my kids and family and have an established business that allows me the freedom to do that.

Karen Langston – My time is definitely my own. My life (so far) has been fun, interesting, independent and rewarding. I enjoy the freedom to travel and live spontaneously. Oh yeah – and no diapers.

Tara Aiello – Freedom. I have two dogs and at times I feel my day is dictated by their schedules. Children are much more demanding than my dogs. The ability to operate on my own clock is a great blessing as I run my own business and develop personally and professionally.

3. What disadvantages have you found in your personal life from not having children?

Yvonne Cavanagh – No answer.

Jennifer Jordan – The fact that all of our friends have kids and when we want to book a spur of the moment trip or simply a spur of the moment lunch, no one can join us.

Karen Langston – Most of my friends have kids which sometimes makes it difficult to schedule girlfriend time.

Tara Aiello – I haven’t felt any disadvantages in not having children. I can always borrow my sister’s kids when I want to enjoy children. I also get to send them home at the end of the day.

4. Have you ever been judged differently than your peers for not having children?

Yvonne Cavanagh – I don’t feel that my peers have judged me differently.

Jennifer Jordan – Yes and no. Some constantly tell me how wonderful it is and I am missing out and others say to each their own. I always feel like I have to defend myself, though, and explain why I am just not there yet. It does get frustrating at times.

Karen Langston – I don’t know.

Tara Aiello – I don’t feel my peers judge me for not having children. Most people I know don’t feel having children is the sole thing that defines women.

5. How does not having children affect you at the workplace?

Yvonne Cavanagh – My high school students always ask within the first few days of school if I have children. I began teaching when I was 23 and at the time I thought that was such a silly question. I felt like a child myself. Now having been married for three years and turning 30 this year, the question is a little more understandable. I always explain to them that I have a full life and am not ready for children. They seem to accept that answer.

Jennifer Jordan – It does not affect me at all. I am able to have a flexible schedule. I am not tied to time periods with kids whether it is school or activities. It’s great to own my business and focus on one thing at a time.

Karen Langston – It definitely results in more hours on the job. When you don’t have to pick up kids at soccer practice or ballet, it’s pretty easy to stay in the office to get caught up.

Tara Aiello – Being a business owner in Downtown Bakersfield, I feel that the fact I don’t have kids has made it possible for me to devote the time and energy toward running my yoga studio and continuing to develop as a yoga instructor. It isn’t to say that my career choice has made it impossible to have children in the future but it has been nice to keep my entire focus with the studio in these first few years under my ownership. The wonderful thing about yoga is that it is appropriate for any phase in life including pregnancy. We recently had a teacher who practiced yoga up until a week before giving birth. I would want to be like that.

6. Do you find that you appreciate other people’s children more because you don’t have children of your own?

Yvonne Cavanagh – I love children. I especially love to hold babies. I am not sure why but I am always drawn to a newborn and love to hold a toddler on my knee. I appreciate the things a child says; their sense of humor is compelling. I will never forget a few years ago when my niece was in the hospital with an IV in what was a scary situation at the time, and the first thing she said when I entered the room to visit was, “I can wiggle my nose like grandpa.” Then lying in the hospital bed, looking so tired, she started to flare her nostrils. I have never laughed so hard. I was there to cheer her up and she was the one who made the first joke. Children have the most amazing sense of humor.

Jennifer Jordan – Absolutely! I can have my cake and eat it too. I do love kids and love playing with them and watching them. Then I get to give them back.

Karen Langston – I think it’s more the opposite – I don’t have kids around all the time so I am not used to all that brings to the table.

Tara Aiello – I don’t really have anything to compare that to since I don’t have any kids. I have a lot of friends and family with children. I love their kids. They all love each other’s kids.

7. Was the fact that you don’t have children based on your career choice?

Yvonne Cavanagh – No answer.

Jennifer Jordan – I am not sure if I actually thought about that or not. Obviously it is much easier (I think) to start a new business and not have kids, although my business partner has two kids and started the same business. She juggles both just fine, so it can be done.

Karen Langston – No.

Tara Aiello – Has this question ever been asked to “Guys on the Green?” I don’t know any women, or men for that matter, who have consciously altered their decision to have children based solely on their career. I think when kids make their appearances unplanned this can obviously affect the course of one’s life. I also don’t know anyone who has had unplanned children who would change things if they could.

8. Is there an aspect of family life that you wish that you had?

Yvonne Cavanagh – No answer.

Jennifer Jordan – No. I’m really quite fulfilled right now. I have a great husband, two adorable labs and a new business that I am completely passionate about. Life is good!

Karen Langston – Yes. I have such a great relationship with my parents. Being as important to someone as they are to me would be amazing.

Tara Aiello – I feel that I have a very full and happy life. I am 28 years old and I have my own business that is staying successful in uncertain times. I am doing what I love. I still feel like I have my whole life ahead me. Each weekend I am visited by niece and nephew and my house is filled with dogs and kids running around and being joyful. At this point in life I could ask for nothing more.

9. What is your favorite thing about children?

Yvonne Cavanagh – My favorite thing about children is that they see an innocence in the world that starts to fade as we grow. They have no fear and the most interesting sense of humor.

Jennifer Jordan – Again, this is why I know I am not ready right now. My favorite thing is that they are someone else’s.

Karen Langston – When they laugh whole-heartedly.

Tara Aiello – Their joy and wonderment. I have this photo of my nephew, covered in sand at the beach and looking like he is about to attack the camera with his huge smile and squinty eyes. The photo encapsulates joy in a way I have never seen. Right next to that is a photo of my niece, meticulously studying a shell. At that very moment nothing outside of the shell mattered at all and it was the most interesting thing she had ever seen. These photos remind me that those qualities still exist in the world although at moments adults tend to forget. They remind me to hold on to those qualities.

10. What differences would you see in your life if you had children early on?

Yvonne Cavanagh – I made a choice not to have children early in my life. I have enjoyed everything I have done in my life and have truly felt that I am leading the life I am supposed to lead. I can’t even imagine how my life would be different if I had children early on. I don’t think that is what I was to do to this point. I have always listened to my intuition and I will wait and listen to what’s next for me. Until then, my calendar is full.

Jennifer Jordan – I think that’s pretty hard to answer. Obviously you adjust when you have kids. Depending on when in my life I had kids early on, I think my path may have been quite different. I am always a believer though that everything happens for a reason and I am sure I would still think my life would be fulfilled right now if I had them. I just might not be where I am right now, but that is not necessarily a bad thing either. I do know that I am right where I am supposed to be.

Karen Langston – How the heck would I know?

Tara Aiello – My life has taken many directions, many of which have been unexpected. It is hard to say what would have happened if children were in the mix. I think things tend to work out in the end. We all adapt to the circumstances in our lives and children are a part of that.

On The Red Couch - September

Think Pink
October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, so it was only fitting for Bakersfield’s Life’s “On The Red Couch” feature to take a look at how breast cancer has affected women in Bakersfield and how we can unite as a community in support of those diagnosed and battling the disease.
Photos by Michael and Esther Duffy, Summit Photography

Sylvia Cariker
19-year survivor of breast cancer

Natalie Grumet
1-year survivor of breast cancer

Joann Nunn
8-year and 6-month survivor of breast cancer

Stana Bright
17-year survivor, recently diagnosed with breast cancer again

Q: What advice would you give other women regarding breast cancer?

Sylvia Cariker - Get your screening mammogram and then continue to get mammograms annually. If you don’t have insurance to pay for these there are a variety of local programs to help the underinsured and the uninsured. No excuses! Contact Links for Life or the American Cancer Society. They’ll hook you up.

Natalie Grumet - I would say to be vigilant about your health. To be your own advocate, listen to your body and to have a doctor that you trust. If I had listened to the first few doctors who told me I was perfectly fine it would have cost me my life. Breast cancer has no boundaries, so no matter your age or background, get the proper screenings and stay on top of your health. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and speak up!

Joann Nunn - You must have faith and believe that you will get through it. You must remember that this too shall pass.

Stana Bright - I would advise other women facing breast cancer to research their options before making a decision on treatment. Find a doctor that you trust and work together. Each patient is different and you can’t compare your case to another.

Q: What aspects of your life have changed since you were diagnosed?

Sylvia Cariker - I know for a fact that I experienced an enhanced spirituality. I do a lot of public speaking on the topic of survivorship and I’m not shy about telling everyone that if you think you can get through your cancer diagnosis and treatment without a belief in a higher power or some kind of faith base, think again. So, in addition to basking in the glow of the incredible love from family and friends and the unexpected compassion of strangers, my faith became stronger.

Natalie Grumet - Having cancer has made me more grateful for life. I have always been optimistic and I am glad that getting cancer hasn’t tainted that part of me. I read somewhere that cancer doesn’t change you, it just amplifies the person you have always been, while some opinions believe that cancer changes a person from the core. I think I go between the two thoughts depending on my mood. I guess the optimist in me would like to believe that any change I have experienced has been for the good. I am definitely more aware of all the positive things in my life and make a conscious effort to focus on those things.

Joann Nunn - Since experiencing cancer I feel my life is richer, friendships are stronger, thoughts are deeper and I have more patience. I don’t sweat the small stuff.

Stana Bright - I do not feel like my life has changed that much. Certain times have been hard, but it has also been the opening to many blessings. Cancer has certainly taught me many lessons and you truly learn to focus on the important things in life. In our support group, we sometimes talk about the gifts of cancer; you have to take the time to see the gifts and know them.

Q: Tell us about your battle and how it has affected you.

Sylvia Cariker - I was diagnosed with breast cancer after finding a lump while showering. Even though I was a volunteer with our local American Cancer Society, I was still terrified. When a doctor says the word cancer to you, it’s hard not to be afraid. I call mine “Cancer Light” because after my mastectomy, no follow-up therapy was recommended: no chemo, no radiation, just a whole lot of doctor’s visits for the next 10 years and a burning passion to find a cure for cancer and to help strengthen those cancer patients who are feeling a little lost. I know that right now many of us are finding it hard to donate to our favorite causes but giving someone else hope -doesn’t cost you a dime.

Natalie Grumet - I was diagnosed with breast cancer one year ago. I had just turned 27 years old. I had unusual pain in my breast that turned into a palpable lump. Between the onset of my symptoms and actual diagnosis was five months, so it was a long road just trying to find out what was wrong. When I found out I had breast cancer I was scared and felt lost. I started chemotherapy and then had a bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. I have recently finished my treatment and major surgeries. I am trying to get back into a normal kind of life, but of course, my life will never be the same. I don’t know if the fear of the cancer coming back or spreading ever goes away. I do believe I am a stronger person for what I have gone through. I remember I used to worry about leaving the house without makeup or doing my hair. But when you go through chemotherapy and have no hair, eyebrows, eyelashes and look white as a ghost, makeup and hair become a luxury. I have learned to become more confident in myself; going out bald will definitely help anyone with confidence.

Joann Nunn - I was diagnosed in 1999 the first time. I had noticed the lump but never thought it could be breast cancer. A doctor had previously told me if the lump wasn’t painful and I could move it around not to worry about it. I didn’t. Some years later after a routine mammogram I was told that I had a tumor. A biopsy was done and the results came back as malignant. I thought malignant, benign, malignant, benign. Which one is the bad one? The doctor then said it is cancer. I realized that it’s the bad one. I told him what a doctor in my past had told me about the lump. He told me, “All lumps should be taken out and analyzed.” Eight simple words, but so powerful. I have since adopted his statement as my response when someone tells me they have a lump. I remember thinking, why me? But if not me, then who? My mother, daughter, sister, niece? Later, I was strong enough to thank God for blessing me with this. Why not me?

Stana Bright - My cancer journey began in May 1991 when I was first diagnosed with breast cancer. I had a mastectomy followed by several months of chemotherapy. Then in May of this year, 17 years to the day, I was diagnosed again. I had another mastectomy and I am currently on chemotherapy treatments again. It was a shock after all these years, but because of my previous experience, I have been able to stay strong and positive.

Q: What gives you hope? What is your inspiration?

Sylvia Cariker - My hope and inspiration can be summed up in one event: the survivor’s lap at the Bakersfield Relay For Life. To see more than a thousand cancer survivors, in various stages of their survivorship, holding hands and walking the track with several thousand cheering them on is not only awe-inspiring but reminds me how far we’ve come in the fight and how much farther we need to go.

Natalie Grumet - Meeting others who are fighting cancer gives me hope and inspiration. I am inspired by the strong spirit of those fighting cancer and their will to never give up. I hope that we find a cure for cancer and improve the ways we can detect cancer to treat it at earlier stages. I am inspired by all the amazing people who are committed to this same hope, many who don’t have cancer but are compassionate and want to be a part of raising awareness as well as funds for research.

Joann Nunn - My hope and inspiration comes from my belief that a cure for cancer is in the very near future.

Stana Bright - My faith gives me hope as it has been strengthened through this experience. My husband, children, family and friends have been beside me and their support makes all the difference. My inspiration is continuing to meet other survivors. I have met women whose faith, courage and humor will stay with me always.

On The Red Couch - July

Getting Away

Summer means many things – heat, kids out of school, and most of all, vacations. Bakersfield Life gathered four local women who know how to vacation in style to ask them about their summer gatherings. These women have been around the world and their responses are fascinating.

Q: If money were no object, what would be your dream vacation?

Colleen McGauley – I’d return to the Amalfi Coast of Italy, rent a large villa for several months and have family and friends visit as they could. We’d cook local foods, explore, work on relaxing, take cooking classes and enjoy the local regions.

Joanne Briones – I’d like to rent a villa in Tuscany for a month. I love the romance, food and culture of Italy. I like the idea of taking a month because my ideal vacation includes immersing myself in the culture and understanding the people.

Debrah Dutton – A European shopping trip would be a great vacation. As an interior designer, my clients often travel with me to buy furnishings and to gather architectural details and design ideas for their projects. This allows me to travel and work and at the same time do what I love.

Mary Christenson – I’m so boring! I love Santa Barbara, check in at the most luxurious spa for a couple of weeks of exercise, pampering, golf, romantic dining with my hubby, shopping – all with no cell phone.

Q: What’s the best trip you’ve been on in your life?

Colleen McGauley – I was blessed with a two-week vacation aboard a sailing yacht. Athens to Rome … for my 50th birthday, no less!

Joanne Briones – My favorite trip was when my husband and I took a cruise through Tahiti. The islands are gorgeous, the water and beaches are unbelievably spectacular and our yacht for the cruise was something like you’d see in a James Bond movie. Everything was first class, but my favorite experience was in Bora Bora. We went to church in a simple open-air sanctuary on lush grounds where we experienced the most moving service. I still remember the singing from that congregation, it sounded like angels.

Debrah Dutton – A few years ago, I spent a month in France and Italy where we explored the gastronomic regions of Lyon and Dijon, France. The experience of fine French cooking and wine tasting in this Burgundy district made this area of France unforgettable. My favorite place to vacation in Italy was at Lake Como near Milan. The landscape of the Swiss Alps as a backdrop to the shimmering lake is something I will never forget. The lake is surrounded by many villas that house beautiful gardens, art and architecture that are unforgettable. I would go back in a minute.

Mary Christenson – A Carribean cruise with my closest girlfriends when I was much younger! What fun! Good memories of all of us working so hard to be in great shape. Also a family trip to Europe – Paris, Scotland, London – three years ago.

Q: Are you more of an adventurer or a homebody?

Colleen McGauley – Adventurer – without a doubt!

Joanne Briones – This may sound odd for someone in my business, but I’m a homebody. I’ve lived in Bakersfield my whole life and I have a fantastic (and large) family and great friends. I like to work on my house.

Debrah Dutton – I am definitely an adventurer.

Mary Christenson – A little of both. I love to scout out villages, museums, fabric and trim shops, local sites and shop! I also like pool time, relaxing with good books, a little golf, just unwinding as well as dinners with my hubby and friends.

Q: Where are you going on
your next vacation?

Colleen McGauley – I leave next week for seven days at the Mendocino Farmhouse. A lovely Bed and Breakfast owned by a friend. Lots of great golf, relaxation and connecting with a dear friend.

Joanne Briones – This fall I’ll go to San Francisco for the USC vs. Stanford game and my husband will fit in golf at Pebble Beach. Next spring we’ll go to Hawaii and I’m excited about staying at the Four Seasons in Maui. My main focus, though, is a group cruise I’m working on for the fall of 2009 to the Western Mediterranean.

Debrah Dutton – I am going to Las Vegas in a few weeks for a furniture marketing vacation.

Mary Christenson – I’m going to Atlantis, Paradise Island in The Bahamas in July for a national real estate awards conference and I’m taking my family.

Q: Do you vacation every summer?

Colleen McGauley – Not necessarily. I squeeze vacations in and around my annual schedule. I prefer traveling at off-peak times when the crowds are a bit diminished. I don’t mind weather changes, so that’s a plus. It doesn’t ruin my world if it rains or even snows!

Joanne Briones – Yes, I do get to travel extensively. But like most people I don’t take a long, expensive trip all the time. I like to visit the coast and take some long weekends closer to home. I do think it’s important to get away, get refreshed and come home re-energized.

Debrah Dutton – Not necessarily. I travel all through the year and some locations are so overcrowded in the summer months that I prefer smaller trips within California as destinations each summer. Favorite summer locations are Laguna Beach, Santa Barbara, Ventura and San Francisco.

Mary Christenson – Yes! We’ve always done a family vacation to Door County Wisconsin – Sturgeon Bay – every year to visit my husband’s parents and family. I love the long walks around the island, sailing, sunbathing, reading, enjoying homemade cherry pie, rich cherry fudge, fresh salmon, corn on the cob and watching the gorgeous sunsets over the water.

On The Red Couch - June

With the Fourth of July just around the corner, Bakersfield Life gathered four women On The Red Couch who are incredibly involved locally. This month, we asked the women about patriotism and the Fourth of July. Their answers are both inspirational and enjoyable.

Jennifer Henry - Executive Director - Links for Life

Lorna Brumfield - Attorney - LeBeau-Thelen, LLP

Kathy Lemon - Assistant Deputy Chief - Kern County Probation

Carola Enriquez - Director - Kern County Museum

What makes you feel patriotic about America?

Jennifer Henry – One of my favorite things about America is that we have the freedom to make choices in order to become the person we want to become. What I really love is when you are at a meeting or volunteering in the classroom and we come together, salute our flag and say the pledge of allegiance. I enjoy hearing all of the different voices united honoring our country.

Lorna Brumfield – The 230-plus year history of democracy. America is one of the few places in the world where the common people get to select those who will govern them.

Kathy Lemon – Supporting our service men and women who have and are currently dedicating their lives for our personal freedom and safety makes me feel patriotic. Knowing the sacrifice they and their families make everyday so we can live in a country where we are privileged to enjoy the entitlement of liberty also makes me feel very humble and grateful.

Carola Enriquez – A good rendition of the national anthem before a game. American flags waving on houses and public buildings. Veterans selling poppies. Just the little reminders of who we are as a nation. Fireworks are my very favorite thing and they always remind me of the Fourth of July no matter where or when I see them.

What are the things about America that make you proud to live here?

Jennifer Henry – I am proud to be an American because women have a choice to work outside the home or be a “domestic engineer” and run their homes. America is a wonderful place where individuals can volunteer their time and talents to make a difference in the lives of others.

Lorna Brumfield – The freedoms we have that almost no other countries have. The government does not mandate our religious beliefs. The public is free to attend and participate in virtually all meetings where the government is making decisions. I am also very proud of the national parks set aside for everyone’s enjoyment. The national parks are truly national treasures.

Kathy Lemon – The United States was founded by a small group of people who were underdogs but had the passion to pursue what they thought was right and fair and I believe that mentality has continued even today. Americans have the courage and freedom to pursue goals and dreams regardless of the odds against them.

Carola Enriquez – There is nothing like traveling somewhere else to appreciate where we live. I actually got to visit Russia in 1972, which was only a few years after it opened to the world after the fall of communism. I truly wanted to kiss the ground we walk on when I returned. We students couldn’t even have a snowball fight without drawing attention from the authorities. We take our freedoms for granted because it's what we know, but most are not so lucky. The freedom to be who you want to be through your own efforts is a real gift this nation gives people.

Do you have any special way of celebrating the Fourth of July?

Jennifer Henry – We usually have a party in the front yard with our family and neighbors. We all bring out tables and chairs with swimming and food.

Lorna Brumfield – My family is very traditional. We gather at my parents’ house where I grew up and have barbecued burgers, fresh corn and homemade ice cream. The neighbors all gather for the store-bought pyrotechnics display put on by the neighborhood kids. The evening ends with everyone watching the fireworks display put on by Stockdale Country Club.

Kathy Lemon – My husband and I are very fortunate in that we are very close with both sides of our family so the Fourth of July is always spent with our family and friends. Our gatherings are fairly typical in that we usually barbecue and hang out by the pool and later in the evening shoot off fireworks. On many occasions we have been fortunate to spend the holiday with family members and other friends at the beach and those times have been wonderful as well.

Carola Enriquez – My favorite thing to do for the Fourth of July in Bakersfield is to see the fireworks show at Sam Lynn Ball Park with an old-fashioned baseball game. I like the patriotic music and all the families enjoying the day together.

Do you have any special memories of Fourth of July celebrations?

Jennifer Henry – What I remember about the Fourth of July, being raised in Bakersfield, is on the third it could be 80 degrees but the on the fourth it was ALWAYS over 100 degrees. It begins the hottest part of the summer with time in the pool and vacations.

Lorna Brumfield – Our family moved from East Bakersfield to Stockdale Estates in 1968. At that time, Stockdale Estates was a small close-knit neighborhood. To this day, Stockdale Estates has an American flag hanging at the entrance. The neighbors used to take turns raising it in the morning and lowering it at night. When I was growing up, all of the neighborhood kids would dress up and put on a neighborhood parade with horses, bicycles, musical instruments and flags. Everyone would stand on the front lawn and cheer as the parade went by. What could be better than your own parade?

Kathy Lemon – On one particular holiday week, our family rented a house overlooking the ocean so we were able to spend the Fourth of July on the beach. I remember sitting around the campfire near the ocean watching the kids play and helping them make s’mores. The sky was clear and you could see all the other families and gatherings taking place along the shoreline. I remember feeling a sense of togetherness and community.

Carola Enriquez – I was lucky enough to be raised just outside of Washington D.C. so we would always go with the masses streaming toward the nation's capitol, parking all over the freeway medians to walk across those magnificent bridges to the Washington Monument to see the fireworks show. Everyone listens to the patriotic music that goes with the fireworks on their car or portable radios. There is nothing like it. My very favorite year was the nation’s bicentennial in 1976. I was working the summer for a defense contractor in Crystal City, Va. and they hosted a huge champagne party in the penthouse suite overlooking all the monuments across the river in D.C. I got to invite my whole family and it was quite an opportunity to watch the fireworks from that vantage point in such a special year.

What is your one wish for America in the upcoming year?

Jennifer Henry – My wish for America is that we see our unemployment rates drop and that we see less violence among our youth and realize what a wonderful place we live.

Lorna Brumfield – Peace.

Kathy Lemon – One issue that I am particularly focused on is the trauma and pain suffered by crime victims and their families, so my one wish for the upcoming year would be for a resolution to many of the issues that contribute to these unfortunate events.

Carola Enriquez – My wish is for us to come together to solve our problems as a team. We have such great people who have come to this nation from all over the world, it seems we should be able to work together to provide leadership toward achieving a peaceful and safe planet for all.

What are your Fourth of July plans for this year?

Jennifer Henry – So far on my calendar we have swimming lessons and swim team practice. For the evening I think we will probably be in the pool with the barbecue going and enjoying time on our block with our family and neighbors.

Lorna Brumfield – We have been invited to attend the Fourth of July baseball game between the San Francisco Giants and the Los Angeles Dodgers at Pac Bell Park, but I am not sure if I can tolerate missing the annual barbecue and homemade vanilla ice cream.

Kathy Lemon – This year we’re planning to stay in town on the fourth. We’ll gather with family and friends at our home for a barbecue and other fun activities. We enjoy watching fireworks with our family and neighborhood friends. The kids love to see how far they can run with a sparkler before it burns out!

Carola Enriquez – We have no plans at all! The kids are too old for the "buy too many fireworks and head to the cul de sac to light them with the neighbors” thing, although I loved doing that. I am sure we will barbecue and just relax at home. I will have sparklers if nothing else and dance around the front yard writing my name in the air. I may steal down to the local fireworks booth and buy a fountain or two of my very own, sit in my lawn chair by the curb and enjoy a little show. Not having a plan seems like a good plan to me.

How do you define freedom?

Jennifer Henry – Freedom is being able to worship whom you choose and ability to become the President of the United States. I look at all the individuals that I know and listen to their stories of their trials of growing up and see that it is possible to realize your dream in whatever career you choose if you work hard enough and believe in yourself.

Lorna Brumfield – Freedom to choose my own religion, voice my opinion and choose my own friends and place to live. Freedom is synonymous with tolerance and to have a free society we must be tolerant of our differences. This is what makes America great.

Kathy Lemon – Freedom to me means the ability to do, say and live in any way you choose as long as it doesn’t hurt others or violate the laws of society.

Carola Enriquez – To me freedom is the opportunity to be who you want to be in a nation that supports just that. We can think what we want, get involved in what we want and pretty much have an American dream that’s our own. Circumstances, our own mistakes and the like, may cause us to fall short, but the dream is there and the right to pursue it is something we all share. It’s a pretty amazing thing. When I see strife all over the world where people are not free in this same way, I feel even more blessed to live in the United States.

On The Red Couch - May

Cindi Tadej
Mother of:
Tyler, age 22
Beau, age 18
Jilli, age 16

Caryl Schweitzer
Mother of Nanette, age 11

Becky Colaw
Mother of:
James, age 13
Jason, age 10
David, age 5
Sarah, age 3

Cindy Meek
Principal, St. Francis Parish School
Mother of Lissa Meek Sittman, 36
Mother of Tally Meek Brand, 33
Mother of Dr. John M. Meek, 31
Grandmother to
Brittany Sittman, age 12
Brianna Sittman, age 10
Charlie Sittman, age 8

What are your summer plans with your kids?

Cindi Tadej - Relaxing, recovering from a long school semester, preparing for college, taking time to enjoy who they are now. My youngest, our daughter, and I spend time that we don’t have during the school year just relaxing, chatting, entertaining and visiting with friends. We have a tradition where we set personal and academic goals for the next school year each August.

Caryl Schweitzer - My husband, Karl, teaches college courses part-time and he usually takes the summer off. What a luxury! He and Nanette plan to study Spanish, French, musical history and theory, and cooking techniques. She’s our designated sous chef and is already quite knowledgeable in the kitchen.

Becky Colaw - We will make some day trips to the beach, weekend trips to visit family in San Diego, go to the our favorite Bakersfield parks and to CALM. We’re also going to try and do some date nights (a new thing for us) with each kid individually. When you have four so spread out everything becomes a compromise. It’s nice when they can set the agenda for themselves once in a while. I think it communicates that while we’re a family and that demands compromise, we love them as individuals.

Cindy Meek - My oldest daughter, Lissa, will be bringing her children to Tahoe to spend a week with their grandparents. My second child, Tally, lives in Tahoe and will spend weekends and evenings with me in July. My son Johnny will be spending a week in Costa Rica with my cousin. Doing his residency at Botsforth Hospital in Farmington Hills, Mich., Johnny does not have the option of visiting Lake Tahoe in the summer. He does join us at Christmas.

What do you do or recommend to keep kids busy during the summer?

Cindi Tadej - When they were little – all kinds of day camps. Tennis, golf, science, basketball, soccer, volleyball, dance, art, acting, music. There are also vacation bible schools for several weeks of the summer.

Caryl Schweitzer - Nanette has a ballet dance recital in mid-June. Then she will go to tennis camp at the Bakersfield Racquet Club for at least one week and to art camp at the Bakersfield Museum of Art for two weeks. And, since she likes the computer so much, we think it’s time she learns how to type. She will be taking an online typing class this summer as well.

Becky Colaw - We will spend time at the pool, hang out with friends and relax. I like to choose some classic literature with good character lessons that we can read as a family. The older boys will have an opportunity to go to camp. We’ll also take out our church’s ice cream truck and give away some ice cream at local parks. I plan to teach my older two kids to do their own laundry and get into a better routine as far as chores go. We have not done a good job of that this year.

Cindy Meek - As an educator and parent I recommend that parents keep their children active both physically and mentally. There are wonderful day camps available through CALM, Lori Brock Museum, CSU Bakersfield and Parks and Recreation. If your child is doing well in school and does not need educational help then keep them reading.
As educators, we find that children who know their math at the end of the school year return 10 weeks later and have forgotten it because they have not looked at a math problem all summer. Having flash cards in the car or in the kitchen and pulling them out periodically and having your children quiz each other or you quizzing your children helps them retain their facts.

If your kids had their way, how would they spend their summer?

Cindi Tadej - When they were young, they would have swam in the pool, laid in the sun, watched movies, played video games and eaten junk food all day, having a pack of friends at the house with them.

Caryl Schweitzer - Nanette would be in a swimming pool the entire time if it were possible.

Becky Colaw- They will be pretty happy with the plans we have, but they would love it if their friends could spend the night every night and if they could stay up all night and sleep all day. My oldest two would love to spend a couple weeks in Oklahoma with family and friends without mom and dad.

Cindy Meek - If my kids had their way, they would spend the summer at Tahoe or the beach. They would be reading on the beach, enjoying boating and water activities, playing games in the afternoon and having friends over for dinner and games or movies in the evening. They would be outside hiking, biking and playing tennis. All three of my kids have community service ingrained in their way of thought so they would also be involved in some type of community service during the summer whether it was fundraising for a particular organization, working on a project or volunteering in a facility.

What is the biggest challenge for children during the summer?

Cindi Tadej - I would say keeping competitive in whatever they aspire to do. Kids now have a lot of pressure to make their summers count in terms of looking the best they can and being the most competitive they can for college applications. So, the challenge is almost to know what they want to do when they grow up so they can begin a steady showing of passion for that - not wasting summers.

Caryl Schweitzer - Keeping her from being bored and watching too much television.

Becky Colaw- They do get bored if not kept busy, and when they do, they want to be in front of the television too much. They also get tired of each other and fight more than they do when they are in school if not given breaks from each other.

Cindy Meek - I think the biggest challenge for children during the summer is boredom and lack of physical activity. They need activities planned for them to keep them engaged and happy. Activities do not necessarily have to be entertaining. I am a firm believer that children need responsibility to be successful. Children should have additional chores added to their days since they are not committed to homework in the evenings. Every child should have some responsibility that he/she is responsible for around the home. Chores need to be completed before the fun begins.

What have you found works well to cure the summer boredom?

Cindi Tadej - Finding activities that your kids love to do, finding new activities to try, finding a way for them to participate and be involved in those things so there is not so much time to be bored. If they don’t want to be involved, then lots of chores are good for curing boredom and can help the parents a lot too!

Caryl Schweitzer - Television and the computer get boring after awhile – even for Nanette, who loves both. Other than going out of town, we arrange play dates, read new books, go shopping, go to the farmer’s market on Saturday mornings then to breakfast at the Santa Fe Café, have a lemonade stand, and keep art materials in stock.

Becky Colaw- If I feel like I am doing my part to provide activities and to keep the kids busy but they are still complaining of boredom, I always have a list of jobs they can do: clean the car, clean out their closet, clean the garage, pretty much clean anything needed. I will be honest. I get frustrated when my kids say they are bored. They want to be in front of the TV or on a video game, and we have to limit the amount of time they do that. When the terrible heat hits, I will be more lenient. Once they remember the list of things I have stored away for summer boredom, I bet they will find a way to entertain themselves.

Cindy Meek - Finding something your child is interested in and expanding that interest. If your child is an athlete get them involved in lessons or club sports. If your child likes to play games, challenge them to learn new games. Many schools have chess clubs where students compete against each other. At our school, we have a bridge club and our first graders are playing bridge with their grandparents.

On The red couch - April

Women in Politics
At a time when we all have politics on our mind, Bakersfield Life brought four of our local political leaders together On The Red Couch. These ladies give insight on everything from women’s roles in politics to where their profession is off limits.

What made you decide to become involved in politics?

Assemblymember Parra - It sounds cliché, but I really thought I could make a difference and improve the lives of my neighbors, family and friends. And to this day, after almost six years as a state legislator, I think I have been able to accomplish many things to this end. But there is still much work to be done and I look forward to continuing my record of public service.

Candi Easter - I have always been interested in politics. As a little girl, I would stay up all night to watch the national conventions. They were always so exciting, even on black and white TV. In the early 90s, I went to a political rally in opposition to the deregulation of the electrical industry in California. There, I met Willie Brown and I was blown away with his ability to motivate people and handle difficult situations. That was the day I decided to get involved in politics and I haven’t stopped since.

Assemblymember Fuller - I wanted to serve my community at the state level. At this point in my career, I felt I had acquired valuable experience that could contribute to forming good, effective policy. I felt it was important to share my views with state representatives and to make sure the people of the 32nd Assembly District had a strong voice in Sacramento.

Susan Moxley - As a family, we have always had an interest in politics. With our 25-plus years of involvement in our community, entering into the political arena was just natural. We enjoy working for our party and trying to do our part to make a small difference. We have spent years working at the local level, at the state level and engaging nationally in Washington, D. C. politics and processes. I guess we just love it.

Describe women’s role in politics.

Assemblymember Parra - In a general sense, women have the same role as men in politics. We are here to represent the concerns of our constituents and offer the vision and dedication to chart a better course for our districts and the state. But in a more specific sense, women also bring something to the table that often seems lacking in politics: balance. Women are used to balancing the demands of family, friends, work and the community. To us, health care is not an abstract
concept or an excessive bill. It is how we take care of our kids and our families. The budget is not just a series of line items with large numbers. It is how we pay our groceries, buy clothes and school supplies.

Candi Easter - Women are the heart of politics. They make the phone calls, walk the precincts, staff the office, form the clubs, plan the fundraisers and make the best candidates. Women have traditionally been in charge of the family and so they come to the table with issues like family values, education, clean environment and health care. When I say, “Women are the heart of politics,” I mean it in every sense of the word. They are the engine that drives the campaign and they bring compassion and soul to the mix. Because of their traditional roles, women have changed the political landscape. The men knew that would
happen – that is why they didn’t let us vote for so long. They are in trouble now!

Assemblymember Fuller - The role for women is the same as for men – making decisions on the allocation of scarce resources. Some perspectives vary between male and female, according to the specific topics.

Susan Moxley - We have beliefs and principles we care deeply about. We are aggressive in regards to expressing our beliefs. We are willing to work diligently to move our issues forward. We engage the process, we work hard and we believe participation in politics is a part of our civic duty.

What places or situations in your life are talking politics “off limits?”

Assemblymember Parra - Being a public servant for most of the past two decades, I have learned to live a much more public life than my friends in the private sector. I have been very open with constituents, colleagues and the media about personal and professional issues and concerns of mine. I believe my openness has allowed me to relate much more effectively with the wonderful people in the Central Valley.

Candi Easter - I have a group of old friends that get together about once a week for a happy hour or a BBQ. They are like an oasis from politics. They know that I just want to relax and we try to steer clear of political discussions. If a controversial subject comes up, I bite my tongue.

Assemblymember Fuller - When I get the chance to spend quiet time at home with my husband, talking politics is strictly off limits!

Susan Moxley - I have out-of-town relatives who are all die-hard Democrats. We have an unspoken rule not to discuss politics at our family gatherings. At times, my husband has difficulty holding to the “unspoken” rule. Although politics is a large part of our life, we do attempt to keep a proper balance.

How do you deal with differing opinions from those you serve?

Assemblymember Parra - Early on in my life, I walked door-to-door to get people registered to vote in Kern County. As a kid, I got involved and worked to give the people of Kern County a greater voice in local, state and federal issues. I remember working on my father’s supervisorial race in Kern County. We did a big “Get Out the Vote” effort and it really opened my eyes to the power of the people, and how reaching out to every resident can truly make a difference.

Candi Easter - That is an interesting question. Democrats don’t all march in line like the Republicans do, so we often have differing opinions. As a leader, I try to always do what is best for the party and hope I make wise decisions. Most folks are supportive and appreciative of my leadership, but when I am criticized, I try to see how I can do a better job the next time. Sometimes, it is just a matter of getting them more involved in the process so they can understand the situation.

Assemblymember Fuller - I always try to first listen and understand each person’s point of view. I respect the opinions of others, but may challenge them in a persuasive manner in order to try to see the bigger picture and to understand all the underlying causes.

Susan Moxley - As president of the Bakersfield Republican Women, Federated, our political principles are very cohesive. We are mutually agreed on core beliefs and there is little room for areas of major disagreement. As a team we work very well together.

What advice would you offer to other women looking to become involved in politics?

Assemblymember Parra - It is always an honor when I meet a young girl and she tells me that she wants to become a public servant and one day run for office. My advice is to stay focused, work hard and set the bar high. If you are ready to put in the time and effort, public service is a rewarding occupation. But never lose sight of the things that are most important to you – your family, your friends and your principles.

Candi Easter - Find something you want to do and dig in! Find a candidate you love or an issue you are passionate about. Very few people working on a campaign are paid, so volunteers have to like their job or they won’t show up. There is nothing like the feeling of being a part of a winning campaign and the friends you make will become a priceless reward.

Assemblymember Fuller - Learn the following skills: impromptu speaking, raising money and speed reading. Campaigning for state office is incredibly expensive – more than I ever imagined. With all the information that an Assemblymember must know and understand, one must be able to read, write, speak and absorb quickly.

Susan Moxley - To start at the local level, engage in the things that are of interest to you and volunteer or enter the political process yourself. To make a difference or to create impact you must be someone who

February On The Red Couch

Food For Thought

This month Bakersfield Life asked some well-known ladies from locally popular eateries what their thoughts were on diets, desserts and other dining dilemmas.

Julie Shine
Co-Owner - Narducci’s Café

Claire Uricchio-Porter
Uricchio’s Restaurant Manager

Maria Gueldner
Owner - Substation
Sandwich Shop

Jennifer Sanderson
Co-Owner - Valentien
Restaurant and Wine Bar

What are your thoughts on trendy diets?

Claire Uricchio-Porter – They are a short-term solution to a lifelong problem. Ideally moderation and exercise should be the goal but that is easier said than done. I have tried most of the weight loss trends and am ready for a new one in 2008…pole dancing classes perhaps?

Julie Shine – I think trendy diets are great if you only have a few pounds to lose. But unfortunately the best way to stay thin is through moderation, watching your caloric intake and eating healthy foods. Oh, and don’t forget the dreaded exercise. Yuck!

Maria Gueldner – All diets seem difficult. I find that eating what you like in moderation can help you maintain a healthy weight.

Jennifer Sanderson – They don’t work. You might lose weight short-term, but what’s the point if you gain it all back? Also, I don’t think it’s a balanced way to get all of the nutrients you need. I once tried to cut fats completely, and my hair started falling out.

Have you encountered a diet that has worked for you?

Claire Uricchio-Porter – The low-carb diet worked well for me because I avoided all the food that calls to me. Unfortunately, when I began adding carbs back into my diet, I over did it and the pounds returned.

Julie Shine – A low or good carb, high fiber diet is the only diet that works for me. Not that I practice it.

Maria Gueldner – I haven’t found a diet that works for me. That is why I find eating healthy with exercising can help you lead a healthy lifestyle.

Jennifer Sanderson – Moderation, moderation, moderation. I actually have never dieted, per se. I admit it is hard to be surrounded by amazing cheese and great bread and stick to anything close to “balance.” The constant tasting of sauces that I do can also quickly add to my hips. So, I try to eat a healthy mix of protein, grains, and vegetables whenever possible. People might be surprised to know I have been a vegetarian for fifteen years, but it works for me. Also, schedule permitting, I’d rather go to Inner Bodyworks for a yoga class than stick to a restrictive diet. I could never give up cheese.

What dessert can you not live without?

Claire Uricchio-Porter – See’s Candy, chocolate chip cookies, brownies – I could live without them, but have not chosen to do so, yet!

Julie Shine – Hmm….my favorite dessert, crème brulee or chocolate. Chocolate cake that’s it. Or maybe carrot cake? Ok, it’s a toss up! No final answer, it’s cheesecake – cheesecake is definitely my most favorite dessert.

Maria Gueldner – I’m not really a “sweets” person. But of course, Frosting Ink cupcakes. It’s my daughter’s business and I find I have to try all new creations.

Jennifer Sanderson – I love most desserts and always have at least a taste. I justify it as research.

Is it easier to dine at home or dine out on the weekdays? How about the weekends?

Claire Uricchio-Porter – I am able to dine “out” often because dinner finds me at work at the restaurant. However, when not at work, I still love to dine out. In my opinion, it is one of the great pleasures of life.

Julie Shine – During the week and on the weekend we eat out almost every meal. We’re lazy. It’s faster, easier and let’s face it probably way better than anything I could make. Oh and virtually no clean up.

Maria Gueldner – Dining out on weekdays seems easier when you run your business. There just isn’t enough time left at the end of the day for cooking. Weekends are the time for cooking and to enjoy a meal with friends and family.

Jennifer Sanderson – Since I only have one day off a week – I eat almost every meal at work. I’m not sure if that’s eating out or eating at home. The two places have started to blur together.

What dishes do you prefer to cook at home and which dishes do you prefer to order from a restaurant?

Claire Uricchio-Porter – At home…does melted butter on popcorn count? Grilled ham and cheese, simple tostadas…that’s my dine-in culinary line up. As I stated earlier I love all that goes with a good restaurant experience…the food…the service and the socializing!

Julie Shine – I come from a long line of great cooks. Out of all of them I’m probably the worst! When we were little, any time I would cook, my brother Michael would call it witchcraft. My 11-year-old nephew Brent is a better cook than me! But I do love to cook when I’m in the mood. On a Sunday I like to make a big pot of soup or stew and toast some baguette. My poor boyfriend Jon! I can never seem to keep to the recipe and I love to wing it. On a week night, a good well seasoned steak seared to medium rare in my cast iron pan combined with a really good salad with balsamic vinaigrette and blue cheese crumbles is nice too. Or maybe just a grilled sandwich on good crusty sourdough and tomato soup. Easy, homey, and yummy!

Maria Gueldner – The dishes cooked at home are always multi -cultural since I like to experiment with different recipes. The dishes ordered at a restaurant would be lobster because I haven’t mastered the technique of cooking it just right.

Jennifer Sanderson – At home I love to cook simply and let food’s natural flavors shine. I am quite creative at cooking healthy vegetarian dishes. I also actually like to cook lamb, beef, and poultry for my partner Jeramy and our friends and family. Generally, I try to eschew heavy cream based sauces, in favor of herbs, spices and a bit of olive oil. When Jeramy and I do get the chance to eat out, we usually way over-order. We want to try everything! When I eat out I don’t pay too much attention to calories, or worry about fat content. I love to see different chefs’ interpretations of a dish. For me, eating out is a celebration. If that means I have to take up jogging, so be it.

On The Red Couch

Going Green seems to be the thing to do these days. This month our four women share their thoughts on living eco-friendly lives and how they do so.
Story by Jason Gutierrez Photos by Summit Photography

Paula Brown
Owner, Yoga Space

Debbie Moreno
President and CEO, Greater Bakersfield Chamber of Commerce

Emily Falke
Chief Curator, Bakersfield Museum of Art

Robin Noble
Owner, Noble Bistro andThe Noble Plan

Q: What are your thoughts on eco-friendly products being more costly?

Paula Brown - I think that the price people are willing to pay is having a positive effect on business; businesses are noticing people want alternatives and offering more. We now have more choices, obviously driven by profit but eventually the market will become more competitive and the prices will come down. I am already seeing this at the grocery store with organic foods.

Debbie Moreno - We all find money for what we think is important.

Robin Noble - I find, most often, that the higher cost equals higher quality or future cost savings (even health care costs). I know that in my food businesses, The Noble Plan and Noble’s Bistro, with a focus on organic, whenever possible, my costs are higher and my prices can be a few cents to a few dollars more. The farmer who chooses to not use poisoning pesticides will experience a smaller crop, he must charge more to stay in business. There is a huge value, though, to dining on beautiful, delicious, and healthy cuisine.

Emily Falke - This is where supply and demand comes in. Where these products have been more costly over time, they are becoming less expensive as people become ecologically aware and move to use such products.

Q: How can we make environmental conservation an important topic for younger generations?

Paula Brown - We are our children’s best teachers. If environmental conservation is important to us it will become a way of life for them.

Debbie Moreno - It already is. My son just started college and he’s as aware as I am of environmental issues and future concerns, has been since elementary school. Kids hear it in school, they are open and receptive (sometimes more than adults). Many businesses and utility companies sponsor projects to make the topic stimulating and interesting in and out of the classroom.

Robin Noble - I like that the entertainers that our children look up to are taking an active role in considering and protecting our environment. Again, I believe conservation has to be a mindset. I grew up in a family where one would never think of throwing eggshells or coffee grinds away – those went on the organic garden. Science projects could be a good place to start in raising awareness. What if Kern schools all determined one year to focus projects on environmental impact?

Emily Falke - Change begins with education. Education takes place in the schools and at home. A basic understanding of how the world works and what it takes to keep it thriving is at the basis of good education. The threat of global warming through human error must be addressed. Encouraging schools to celebrate Earth Day as one of the most important celebrations of the year. Teaching ways to live in balance in a world that has gone out of balance.

Q: What are your thoughts on global warming?

Paula Brown - My thoughts on global warming are that there is more evidence supporting it than facts to dismiss it. We need to take notice and do whatever we can to slow it down.

Debbie Moreno - The debate has brought important attention to issues surrounding our environment and its care. More and more people are understanding that many of our resources are finite and this has stimulated efforts by business to most effectively use those resources and to develop technologies for renewable resources. But there’s no easy solution. If you keep in mind that power for electricity comes 50 percent from coal and 20 percent from nuclear power and that it takes four gallons of water to produce one gallon of ethanol, you can see that it’s not an either/or situation. It’s clear we need to work together and we need to make the best use of all our resources.

Robin Noble - In the US our individual efforts against global warming are significant. Individuals are estimated to release 10,000 pounds of carbon dioxide and other greenhouse gases in the atmosphere each year. We can help by becoming more energy efficient and reducing our use of oil, gasoline, electricity, and coal. Another way that we sometimes don’t automatically think about, is using locally produced products. Making energy conservation a part of our daily awareness is essential to the goal of reducing global warming.

Emily Falke - Human activity has more than likely been the driving force in the warming trend over the past years. Global warming is a worldwide problem and my concern is not how much humans are responsible for warming the planet, but what to do about it. It needs to be dealt with on a worldwide basis, as it is a global issue. Historically, the earth’s climate has regularly shifted back and forth between temperatures. But, with temperatures rising at unprecedented speed, the unpredictable climate allows for more intense storms and drier droughts that in turn pose unique risks to all life.

Q: What do you do at home that’s eco-friendly?

Paula Brown - I recycle paper, plastic, cardboard, and glass. All fruit vegetable and plant scraps go into the green waste container. I have solar panels on my home. I drive a hybrid. I use only natural fertilizers outside. I built my house to utilize natural light and have fluorescent light bulbs throughout. I planted around 40 trees on my property. I shop for organic food first and I belong to an organic fruit and vegetable co-op, which means my produce is picked here in the central valley and brought to me. I built my house utilizing the concrete floors--the foundation is the floor. I am in the process of eliminating junk mail.

Debbie Moreno - Wow, my first thought was “not much,” but actually we are doing a few things at our house. We recycle cans, have just remodeled our kitchen with all new energy efficient appliances, have replaced nearly half of our lightbulbs with energy efficient bulbs and last year my husband and I both replaced our cars, going from vehicles getting 15 and 20 miles per gallon to ones getting 20 and 30 miles per gallon... not hybrids, but definitely better. We also had PG&E come out and do an energy audit a few years ago. I would recommend that to anyone.

Robin Noble - Though my home is more than 100 years old, it has been modified to make it more energy efficient. The windows are dual paned, lots of added insulation, a combo evaporative cooler/AC unit, etc. I recently disconnected the instant hot water on my sink when I discovered how much energy is used just to save me the minute or two to heat a cup of water. I am an avid recycler. I’ve replaced my light bulbs with energy efficient compact fluorescent bulbs, when I’m shopping for new appliances, I try to buy the energy saving star-rated new ones and in the garden, I mulch!

Emily Falke - I conserve energy – minimal lights, heating, cooling, and water use. As an avid cook and gardener, I focus on natural foods and personal products along with low or chemical free products. I do not use pest exterminators but I will set a natural peanut butter trap for an annoying mouse.

On The Red Couch

Between work, children, marriage and extracurricular activities, working mothers have their hands full when trying to find a happy balance in their lives. This month “On The Red Couch” places four successful working moms together to talk about how they make life work in their favor.

Michelle Mize – The Mize Agency
Cheryl Scott – Vice President at Kern Economic Development Corporation
Carla Musser - Public Affairs Manager for Chevron
JoAnn Meyer – Senior Vice President of Aera Energy

Does the traditional family hierarchy exist in your family?

Michelle Mize – Yes, we have a traditional family structure. My husband is head of the household in the Christian meaning of the word. He does the manly stuff like take out the trash and cleans out the garage and I do the cooking, cleaning and laundry.   We are both busy so we do share a lot of family responsibilities. Actually one of my favorite things to say is “I need a wife.”

Cheryl Scott - My husband, Darren, and I started dating so long ago (when we were teenagers) that it almost feels like we grew up together. We have always approached marriage and parenting as a team and there are certain issues he is better suited to handle with our boys (14-year-old Jake and 11-year-old Zack) and some that I’m better suited to handle. The best part is that depending on the subject or the timing, either one of us can say to one another, “Okay, this ball is in your court!” As the boys are getting older, I do see myself looking to Darren more to take the lead since he knows what it’s like to be a teen-aged boy!

Carla Musser - My husband and I share the responsibility of managing our family. With both of us working full-time it takes both of us working together to keep everyone happy.

JoAnn Meyer - Traditional hierarchy in the most conventional sense does not exist in the family if by hierarchy you mean that the husband makes all of the decisions. Of course, I don't make all of the decisions either. There is a lot of flexibility around decision-making between Charles and I.

What is dinnertime conversation like for your family? Or does everyone’s schedules not match up with one another?

Michelle Mize - Even with all the kid activities we try and have dinner at the table most nights. Our conversations usually are about the kids’ day. Sometimes everyone talks at once and sometimes it is hurry up and eat, so we can go pick someone up or drop someone off.

Cheryl Scott - We try to have dinner together at the kitchen table on most nights that aren’t consumed with baseball games. I admit, though, that
often happens thanks to the crock-pot or restaurant carry-out…having the energy and desire to cook a nice dinner is one of my greatest challenges as a working mom. I think dinner at our house is pretty entertaining when it’s just the four of us; we can get pretty silly! When the silliness calms down, though, the conversations are usually about the typical things, like, how our days went at school and work, and lately they have been turning to more forward-looking things like careers and colleges for the boys. With a high school freshman, I relish every minute of time together when I’m not competing with the computer, iPod, video games, television and yes, even homework!

Carla Musser - There are more times that our schedules do not match up at dinnertime during the week. However, our lives seem to slow down more on the weekends and we purposely plan special family dinners on Saturday and Sunday.

JoAnn Meyer - I have to work hard to get everyone around the table for dinners 3 or 4 times a week. The conversation is usually about each person's day or upcoming events. It is very common for us to discuss everyone's schedules for the next week or so.

Do you think more women are choosing to be stay-at-home mothers or heading straight back to work?

Michelle Mize - I think more women are trying to stay home or at least have part time schedules. I think being in a good financial place is important so the husband and wife can choose what is best for their family.

Cheryl Scott - I have very dear friends on both sides of that aisle, but it does seem that women are, more and more, choosing to be working moms, whether it’s full-time or part-time or working flexible hours. For those of us who do head to work after babies, it sure is helpful to work in a position where we have the flexibility to be there with our children when they really need us – whether it’s because they have broken their wrist, or just because they really want us to work at their class party or go on a field trip.

Carla Musser - I think the younger generation appears to take off more time with the birth of their children, versus my age group tended to go straight back to work. This requires lots of pre-planning because most families need the dual income to pay the house and car payments.

JoAnn Meyer – What I see is that women have more options these days than I remember 20 years ago. It is not unusual for a woman to ask for a modified work schedule which is part time versus full time immediately after she returns from maternity leave. Most of the time, the company is able to meet her personal needs without sacrificing what the business needs. This arrangement can exist for prolonged periods of time.

How do you find a happy balance between work and family?

Michelle Mize - I pray a lot. I know my priorities and I try to never deviate from the plan. If you keep God and family at the top of your priorities, everything else will fall into place.

Cheryl Scott - That’s the million-dollar question! Just when you think you’ve got it under control, something goes haywire. There have been times when I felt like I was “robbing Peter to pay Paul” when it came to my time. Like when I’ve had to be absent from work for a family activity…or, on the other hand, when I’ve had to work on the weekend or into the evening instead of focusing on the kids. There was an internal struggle with guilt that I had to get past, but after 14 years, I realize better that the key is being where I am most needed at any given time, and trying to stay focused on the here and now. Jake and Zack are very good at communicating…if they see that I’m bringing my stress home or if I am a little distracted, they bring me back to earth. I am amazed at how much insight children have when you ask for their take on an “adult” work issue; sometimes bringing them in on what is bothering me helps them understand the challenges we face in the work world, and it gives me the benefit of their unbiased and pure wisdom and advice, which is often right on target!

Carla Musser - It takes both my husband and I working together to balance work and family. Communication is important to making this work. We plan our schedules in advance as much as we can so we know who needs to be where and when, especially when one of us is going to be out of town. Planning ahead makes our lives easier and causes the least disruption in our daily routine.

JoAnn Meyer - Balance is very tough and priorities are ever changing. There may be a month where there are increased demands at work and I have to spend less time with the boys and Charles than I would like. When the crunch is over, I try to re-evaluate and take specific actions to ensure that I don't just fall into the habit of working late every night. I am privileged to work for a company that allows me flexibility to be involved with my children when situations arise – even during work hours. Do I ever feel that I have found that perfect balance and I just need to follow the schedule - NO.

How do you manage extracurricular activities (sports, clubs, music lessons etc.) in the family?

Michelle Mize - I drive a lot and almost never have a free weekend. It sounds crazy, but we usually have some sort of sports practice 4 -5 nights a week and games on the weekends – usually out of town. We divide and conquer, my husband goes one way and I go another. All three of my children play club sports and school sports – it is a challenge, but we love it.

Cheryl Scott - For us, it comes down to: prioritizing, scheduling and helpful grandparents! Our schedules are crazy-busy, so we have started to really prioritize our activities (which can be tough on a 14-year-old when it means YES to baseball lessons, but NO to guitar lessons…for now). I’m blessed that my mom and dad live nearby and often come through in a pinch when it comes to driving to cross country meets or the orthodontist or resolving some unexpected crisis, like “Mom, my team picture is today and I don’t have my uniform with me!”

Carla Musser - We plan our schedules around extra curricular activities. Between my job’s evening and weekend activities, and our kids’ activities, my husband and I ensure one of us attend our kids’ activities--if not both of us.

JoAnn Meyer - My lifestyle would not be possible if Charles was not as supportive and involved as he is. We are fortunate that most days Charles has a bit more flexibility in his work schedule than I do. As a result, if the boys have activities or appointments after school, many times Charles can plan his work-week to be available.

Is the role for working mothers different than it was ten years ago?

Michelle Mize - I hope that more women are trying to do it all – be a good mom and have a career. Some people say you can’t do it all. Why not? For me it comes back to the balance thing – keep your priorities straight and you can do it all. You just might need to redefine what “having it all” looks like. It might not be monetary success – but it should be healthy family success.

Cheryl Scott - I think the biggest change for me has simply been that my boys have gotten older and more self-sufficient.

Carla Musser - I believe the role of the working mother is different than it was ten years ago. Years ago it was expected that the mother cooked the dinner, picked up the kids from their activities, etc. Today, the father has a 50% stake in these activities. With my job my husband does more than his fair share; he cooks more dinners than I do.

JoAnn Meyer - Don't know that I think my role as a mom that works outside the home is different than 10 years ago. Maybe it is for other women, but I am not sure that I have noticed much difference other than my children are older.

What advice do you have to share with other working moms?

Michelle Mize - Don’t miss anything – go to every class party, every play, and every soccer game. Schedule your kids like you schedule your work appointments. Take your vacation time or lose an hour of pay if you have to, but go to that school event or volunteer to be room mom. Being a mom goes so fast and you never get to do it over. Take your kids out to lunch too. Use your lunch hour to make them feel special; you will get valuable one on one time that is difficult to have at night or weekends. And the best part is they open up and tell you lots of juicy school drama.

Cheryl Scott - Having a strong support system of friends and family makes everything easier. I’ve learned so much, and gained so much confidence, from some of my dear friends who are also moms, whether they work outside the home or not. Their tips and encouragement are invaluable. You never know where those women will be found, either – it might be through church, it might be co-workers, or it might be the next door neighbor…I’ve been lucky enough to find them in all those places and more.

Carla Musser - Always maintain a balance between work and family. This is important to your emotional well-being and your family’s. Your family should be your first priority and your job second. Families are not replaceable, jobs are.

JoAnn Meyer - Work hard to find a little time to recharge your battery - everyone benefits from what might be a small investment of time – and take vitamins!!

October Red Couch

While Bakersfield may not be snow capped and temperatures aren’t projected to be below freezing, the winter holiday season is here! This month Bakersfield Life’s Red Couch is discussing community holiday traditions, priceless family get-togethers and more with four of Bakersfield’s most festive women!

Q: Personally, what is your favorite part of the holiday season?

Diana: Personally, the holidays represent a time when families get together to celebrate connection and joy. Creating a great dinner menu, sharing the food, breaking bread together, seeing our grandchildren laugh – it is a wonderful time.

Cristy:   I’ve always loved the sense of anticipation leading up to the holidays. It doesn’t hurt that it is also a big birthday month in my family. My sister Lesley and I turn 29 every December! Really, though, I love getting ready: the shopping, the decorating, and the baking. I have really fond memories of that weekend after Thanksgiving when my sisters and I would start begging my mom to pull out the Christmas decorations and we would turn on the Johnny Mathis Christmas album and go to town on the house.

Jenny: Christmas morning. In my family, everyone wakes up, and comes over to my house. We eat croissants, and drink coffee while we look inside our stockings. Then, we open gifts around the Christmas tree. I just love seeing everyone’s reactions, especially my granddaughter, Gabriella.

Darlene: For the past 20 years we get together with friends and host a holiday friends and family celebration. These are friends who grew up together with our children and are now raising their own children. It is rewarding to see these individuals grow from pre-teens into contributing members of our community doing excellent jobs as parents, professional contributors and mentors. Our celebration always is centered around family, food and fun – not to mention Christmas carols, Santa and car rallies!

Q: Professionally, what is your favorite part of the holiday season?
Diana: Professionally, I have seen the amazing generosity of this community at holiday time for homeless families and children. I have been a part of eight holiday seasons at the Bakersfield Homeless Center (BHC) and each and every year people open their hearts to help our families. We are a community of people who care and give and reach out.

Cristy: I love that everyone is a little more laid-back and jolly, even though the idea of work slowing down through the holidays is strictly an urban legend. Even though I shouldn’t admit it, I love all the goodies everyone brings into the workplace. It’s neat when everyone brings their homemade treats and shares the stories that go with them – its like you are getting a glimpse into their personal history in one calorie-laden lump of sugar.

Jenny: Honestly ... when it’s over. Between finding the time to buy presents for my loved ones, and working doubles every day, I’m just exhausted. I enjoy all the Christmas parties and seeing all the families who eat at the restaurant, but by December 24th, I need a break.

Darlene: Being able to help the Bakersfield Homeless Center and the many children they serve during the holiday season. Castle & Cooke is very supportive of my volunteerism with the Bakersfield Homeless Center and the holiday season can be so very heartbreaking and stressful if you are homeless. Being able to alleviate some of this burden is very rewarding for me personally, but I would not be able to be as effective without the support of my employer.

Q:What is your favorite family tradition that you have taken from your childhood and passed on to your immediate family?

Diana:   The love that surrounds the holidays. Some years we have a tree, some we don’t. Some years the presents aren’t as abundant as others. But, what is consistent is the love for each other and the genuine appreciation of family and friends. My grandmother had several oil hurricane lamps, which were passed down to me. We light and use them often during the holiday season in remembrance of all the family and friends who are no longer with us.

Cristy:   Well, of course it is about food. When I was young, our neighbors shared an amazing sugar cookie recipe with my mother that had been brought with their mother when she emigrated from France. It is the most amazing thing ever and we can’t do Christmas without it. They are quite an ordeal to make and involve all the kids and grandkids. I have pictures of myself as a child and each one of my children wielding the cookie press and the sprinkles as we make batches to take to school parties, holiday parties or to neighbors. They won’t even let me in the door at work during the holidays if I don’t bring them.

Jenny: As a family, we always go to Christmas Eve mass, and eat tamales that our employees make for us.

Darlene: My grandmother used to make cinnamon fried pies during the Depression for her family. This treat was so loved by my dad and his siblings that my grandmother carried this on with the next generation and the great grandchildren as well. I learned at her knee how to do this and I now make them during the holidays and sometimes in between.

Q: How many people are on your holiday greeting card list?

Diana: My holiday greeting card list used to be huge! These days, I send very few cards and most of those are to professional colleagues and friends. But, last year, our family sent out a few fun New Year’s Day cards – so I am ever hopeful of sending those to more friends and family.

Cristy:   There are a lot of people on the list. And there are a lot of cards still in boxes in my garage – a lot of cards. As a matter of fact, I may open up my own holiday card shop very soon. I always start out with the best of intentions, but things just don’t slow down and before you know it, it’s too late to get them out. I had a friend who sent out a really clever “middle of January” card last year. That’s got style. I may try to pull that off myself.

Jenny: I’m horrible. I only find time to send Christmas cards to family that lives out of town.

Darlene: I must admit that I am terrible about holiday greeting cards. I feel guilty when I get the lovely cards from my family and friends. I promise this year I will get in gear and show my friends how much they truly mean to me by way of holiday cards.